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wow, those poor kids
My mother called me yesterday to tell me her dying wish because of her (lately) intense fear of dying. She wants me to have a teaching position before she dies.

Oh, it gets better.

I'm apparently taking my test in either September or November to be certified as a secondary school teacher in Oklahoma. When I told her this, she started crying big Korean blubbery tears and went on about how she's going to die soon. I'm not being nonchalant about the dying thing, since she's been thinking that she has been since I was five years old, but still.. I have to respect the dying wish, right?

So it's Ms. Pool to you, maybe.

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your love for her shows more than you think it does

I know.. I do love my mother. That's why I'm doing this, I guess.

And I'll be sending you an email soon, promise. ;)


You remember that you hate kids, right? People in general?

But, as always, I support you in all your actions. Godspeed.

How bad could it be?


Oh yeah! They tend to frown upon pedophiles becoming teachers. I don't know why.

Remember--none of these boys are Harry Potter! This is not Britain-land.

What grade would you consider teaching? You should make sure you practice physical punishment, because bratty kids should die.

I was planning on getting certified in both secondary english and world history/geography. I don't NEED to practice physical punishment, geez.

Is it also her dying wish that you spank kids while wearing thigh-highs? Because, you know... that's my dying wish :).

But seriously, I doubt your mother could ever be disappointed in you... dying wish or not. Compared to Oklahoma standards, you're riding the gravy train to Easy Street with Subway. Oh nevermind. Trust me, it sounded a lot funnier in my head.

I'll bet you're good with kids.

If by easy, you mean the prostitution. Slinging sandwiches just don't pay the rent no mo'.

I heeeeeeeerd dat.

You'd be a hot teacher!

don't you like asians and their obsessions?!??!

it was very nice seeing you last night.

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